Tasting/Testing Ep.13 "Sour Grape Soda"
The Squared “Sour Grape Soda” was tasty and sweet, but didn’t actually contain much THC.
This drink claims 5 mg THC from hemp, and thus is not sold from a state-regulated “dispensary”. It came from a beer store on Mass Ave.
This satisfying grape soda brought me back to my enjoyment as a child, when grape sodas were “exotic”. The label calls it “sour” grape soda, but it tastes regular to me. I wonder how many adults want their daily THC from such a sweet drink? I don’t want that much sugar, and I rarely drink soda anymore.
The actual text on the can is, “Industrial hemp sourced from U.S. grown Organic Farms.” Nobody ever grew a farm, they are built by people; HEMP is grown on farms, and some hemp MIGHT be organic.
The most likely way to make a THC beverage from hemp would be extract CBD from it, and chemically convert the CBD to THC. I did synthetic chemistry for research, and I’ve discussed the synthesis of cannabinoids with several industrial-scale practitioners. I doubt extraction of domestic hemp is a major source of CBD for “intoxicating hemp” products such as this one. The building blocks for THC in this drink probably came from East Asia.
The nutrition panel mentions “Fused polymorph hemp ∆9 nano fiber,” which looks like pseudo-science gobbledegook. Squared comes from Rexis Biotech, and this language echoes their website (https://rexissystems.com/).
The List of Ingredients has sugar after flavors and colors, but ingredients should appear from most abundant to least. Water should be first because drinks are mostly water. Sugar should be second because this contains 16 g of sugar. The remaining ingredients contribute far less to the composition, so placing sugar lower appears likely to deceive consumers.
After letting it go flat, we measured the Squared “Sour Grape Soda” on the Lightlab 3 HS from Orange Photonics, Inc.. We were shocked to find no detectable cannabinoids!
Incredulous, we examined the chromatogram ourselves. The OP dashboard makes it easy to compare all the data from different runs, including the chromatograms.
We could see one small peak in our chromatogram of the soda that might be from THC. We compared that with the chromatogram from the CQ “Blackberry Lemon Lime Spritzer” (https://lnkd.in/eQQxs6Bb), which confirms that this peak is indeed from THC. Guided by the height of the peak from the “Blackberry Lemon Lime Spritzer”, we determined that the Squared “Sour Grape Soda” contains 1/2 mg THC or less.
Trying to find where the THC went, we used the LightLab solvent to extract the empty can from the Squared beverage. LightLab detected the THC that dissolved in the solvent as it swished around in the can. That helped us to confirm that this Squared beverage was once infused. At the time of consumption, it was much less so.
TL;DR
🥤 Episode 13: Squared “Sour Grape Soda”—Sweet, Purple, and (Almost) Powerless.
This one tasted like childhood. Think of that nostalgic grape soda you’d beg for at pizza parties—except this can promised 5 mg of THC and came from a beer shop on Mass Ave, not a corner store. 😏
And guess what? This purple pop from Rexis Biotech had all the vibes of a classic soda—but when it came to the infusion? We had to squint. Hard.
🧪 We tested it on the LightLab 3 HS and… nada. No THC. None.
After our usual decarbonation ritual and a suspiciously blank chromatogram, we thought maybe the THC was just being shy. Turns out, it was probably hiding—on the inside of the can. We found traces of it only after rinsing the empty can with solvent.
So yes, it was infused at one point. But by the time it hit your taste buds? That “dose” had mostly ghosted. 👻
Let’s be honest: the label copy was already suspect. “Fused polymorph hemp ∆9 nano fiber”? Okay, science fiction. 🤓
“Industrial hemp sourced from U.S. grown Organic Farms”? Sounds good… but CBD converted to THC isn’t a farm-fresh process. Based on our experience (and chemistry degrees), the active ingredients probably took a long flight from East Asia.
🍬 Also, this soda packs 16g of sugar, which the label tries to hide by listing it after the flavors and colors. Cute trick—but sugar should be second only to water. That’s not just nutrition—it’s labeling law.
We’re not anti-fun-flavored drinks, but this one served more sugar than substance. And if you’re chasing cannabinoids with your soda, you’re better off skipping the sci-fi buzzwords and checking our lab reports first.
